If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters very much.”— Jackie Kennedy Onassis
In this department, there are no do-overs. One shot is all we get.
I was lucky, I was blessed to have given birth to two healthy children. And the strange thing was growing up I never envisioned myself in this role. Not at all. Ever. I had a hard enough time just taking care of myself. And yet as I reached my late twenties, watching my friends have children and more children, those original plans for myself gave way to dreams about baby booties and the wonders of breastfeeding.
I always believed babies were beautiful creatures. Messy, but beautiful and never moreso than when they’re ours. I don’t think it’s possible for a mother to look at her child and think anything other than the sun rises and sets on this face. We’re simply not programmed that way. For us, it’s imperative that we look past any and all imperfections and hold our precious little offspring up to a level reserved only for future kings and queens. Because if we don’t, well then we’ll never survive the rough patches which may or may not include years of rebellion, alcohol, and drugs.
It’s a harrowing road. One we don’t even think about no matter how many children we have. No. Scratch that. We think about it, alright. We think about the emotional wear and tear, the financial pros and cons, that trip to Paris we’re never going to take, the full night sleep we’ve finally garnered after kid #2, the grueling hours pushing out a fucking watermelon. Yes, we think about it. But only for a nanosecond. Again … because this is how we’re hot-wired.
I’m not sure our children ever truly realize all that we do for them. What great sacrifices were made on our part so that they could have a better education, live in a safer environment, experience life from all angles before going off on their own. As mothers (and fathers), we don’t do these things with any sort of expectation in mind. We just do them. We ignore and accept that their worlds have imposed on ours and hopefully somewhere along the way that heartfelt realization will eventually come to light.
And if it doesn’t? Well, I don’t know about you, I’ll send my ducklings a little note (and not an email) just to remind them.
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